I don't even know what to say

Yesterday afternoon I got some bad news. Diana, a girl that went to my high school, who threw with me for a year, whose older brother was one of my best friends in high school was killed in a car accident. Two months ago a boy was killed in a car accident who was in Diana's graduating class. For such a small town, we've experienced a lot of deaths since the time I started high school.

I don't think that it has hit me yet... it usually doesn't until the viewing. The viewings are always the worst. I cry more for other people than I do for myself. Seeing the family's grieving is what sends the tears down my cheeks.

Isn't it odd how strong most families are at a viewing? Their faces are always set in stone, emotionless. I know that if I were ever in their shoes it would be a completely different story. I'm too emotional. I cry too much. I'm not ashamed of my feelings, although most people are.

Some thing that I find odd is how facebook now plays a part in grieving. I've noticed that as soon as the word gets out about someone's death everyone flocks to their facebook account. Person after person leaves prayers and memories. I'm not going to lie. It kind of freaks me out a little bit, but I find myself drawn to the accounts and reading the wall posts, and crying even more.

Tomorrow Lauren and I have a busy day. We have an open enrollment from 10-3 in Cochranton, then we have to head back to Erie for a new group enrollment @ 4:30. It could very easily turn into a 12 hour day, which means that I will probably be grouchy tomorrow. I apologize ahead of time.

I know that this entry is different than most of mine. But I guess it just fits my mood.

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